fetch-those-damned-bolt-cutters:

yunabot:

one of the best/funniest dynamics on TV is antagonistic best friends who insult each other constantly but are immediately in cahoots whenever there’s a whiff of shenanigans. nothing better than two bozos bickering nonstop as they execute the stupidest plan you’ve ever heard

Originally posted by doctorwhowhore

(via punchholesinthesky)

randomslasher:

frozenartscapes:

theramblingvoid:

Why don’t I hear more about undead beings coming back to warn people? It’s always zombies wanting to drag people down to join them in the grave, ghosts seeking vengeance, spirits trying to chase people out of their domains - but if you died horribly and were left rattling around some spooky mansion for eternity, wouldn’t you want to stop people from blundering into the same death you had?

You feel a cold breath on your neck as you get in the car. It won’t leave until you fasten your seatbelt. An unseen force catches your foot as you pass the fourth step every time you walk up the stairs. During a renovation, you find out the wood is rotten. You can never find a pack of cigarettes - even ones guests bring disappear from their pockets and are found weeks later on the lawn, empty. Your daughter is giggling and laughing at something unseen, chasing after it away from the cliffside on your family hike. You don’t know why, but you feel compelled to leave a spare hairband and some stickers on a picnic table as you leave the park. Tribute? A thank you? The items are gone by next time you visit, and you swear a happy child’s hum follows you home on the breeze.

…More preventative hauntings. It just makes sense.

Everyone is convinced the old house on the hill is full of evil spirits because anyone who tries to sneak in gets the ever loving shit scared out of them by the craziest poltergeist imaginable

Turns out the house had massive structural issues and was just one door-slam away from caving in on itself and the ghost was trying to keep people safe

Once the house did finally collapse the ghost moved on to the old abandoned factory that never had its industrial waste properly disposed of

Eventually the local inspection unit gave it an honorary OSHA certification

I need 23,000 more of these please

(via electribunny)

guerrillatech:

(via superflyse)

doyouknowwhatimeme:

(via reaperfromtheabyss)

daystarsearcher:

Current linguistics obsession: the difference in English between “few/little” and “a few/a little”

“He convinced few people” Negative connotation; he did not convince that many people.

“He convinced a few people” Neutral to positive connotation; he did manage to convince some people.

“They found a little food” “Neutral to positive connotation; it might not be a lot, but they did manage to find some food.

“They found little food” Negative connotation; that’s not going to be enough food.

(via characterlimit)

astray-as-a-cat:

Did you eat? (I love you) I bought the bread you like (I love you) I noticed you were upset so I brought you tea (I love you) I made this for you (I love you) I know you have a lot of work and can’t talk now so I will leave this thing you like around (I love you) I did your chores (I love you) I will sit by in case you need anything (I love you. I love you. I love you)

(via amynchan)

anxietyproblem:

(via anxietyproblem)

cipheramnesia:

reality-detective:

How an Armadillo gathers foliage for its nest.

When I’m carrying all the bags of groceries inside in one trip.

(via alemongrenade)

isthissoup:

I love these two so much.

Credit: @jellymlk on twitter

(via unklarity)

gaypornvideoswebsite:

sent an email without exclamation points #mean #meanie #meancore #evilgirl #hurtingyou #indifferent #gayandrude

(via characterlimit)

sango-blep:

:’)

(via qrred)

legitimately:

need a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars cash

(via winged-mammal)